Best Practices in Romantic Equity Management
Partner Management is a special division of the Social Resources Department concerned solely with managing romantic social equity: girlfriends, muses, and affairs. The highly specialized Partner Management staff carefully evaluate Potential Romantic Opportunities using sophisticated algorithms. Key romantic metrics include relative adorableness, humor index, and half-asianness. If the standardized romantic rubric indicates favorable conditions, the Potential Romantic Opportunity is expedited to active partner management. A team of case managers, text message writers, and awkward mitigation technicians are on hand to provide a holistic approach to traditional pairbonding methods. The stated goal of the Partner Management Department is to ensure an Exclusive Partnership Agreement between EDW Lynch and a Potential Romantic Opportunity.
If you are offered a Partnering Opportunity with EDW Lynch please read our FAQ as your Preferred Rhombus™ account may be affected.
Vice President of Partner Management
Jasmine Steel, Esq.
Director of Romantic Operations (DRO)
Adam Andrews, Esq.