Ask EDW: What is the Letter of Romantic Intent?

.…..Ladies?

THE QUESTION:
What is the Let­ter of Roman­tic Intent?
–J., Port­land, Oregon

THE ANSWER:
Great ques­tion. The Let­ter of Roman­tic Intent is a legal doc­u­ment which expresses my roman­tic inter­est to a girl in clear con­tract language.

In 2009, the man­glom­er­ate expe­ri­enced a series of moments of awk­ward­ness due to what we call a roman­tic inter­est mis­match. In layman’s terms a mis­match occurs between two peo­ple when one party has roman­tic intent and the other does not. Obvi­ously if one party (we’ll say EDW Lynch) acts on his roman­tic intent with say, a kiss attempt, and the other party (we’ll say an adorable yoga instructor/ukulele musi­cian) was not expect­ing and does not wel­come this action, then we have a severe moment of awkwardness.

The Part­ner Man­age­ment (dat­ing) Divi­sion and our legal depart­ment held a series of meet­ings to find a way to pre­vent these MOAs from occur­ring. The result of these meet­ings is the Let­ter of Roman­tic Intent.

In broad strokes the LRI clearly dis­closes EDW Lynch’s roman­tic inter­est in the girl in ques­tion. It explains the dif­fer­ences between a friend­ship with EDW Lynch and a roman­tic rela­tion­ship (or “Part­ner­ing Oppor­tu­nity.”) It dis­closes the like­li­hood of moments of awk­ward­ness as a result of future roman­tic efforts. A neu­tral medi­a­tor is iden­ti­fied, should EDW Lynch say or do any­thing to the girl in ques­tion that is con­fus­ing and requires expla­na­tion. And finally, should the Part­ner­ing Oppor­tu­nity fail, the Ter­mi­na­tion process is clearly out­lined for both parties.

The Let­ter of Roman­tic Intent brings the clar­ity and fair­ness of con­tract law into roman­tic rela­tion­ships. It’s just another social inno­va­tion from the EDW Lynch Cor­po­rate Manglomerate.

So if you receive the Let­ter read it care­fully and run it by your attor­ney. Should you elect to sign it, you’ll be rewarded with the unique delights and chal­lenges of dat­ing EDW Lynch.

See Also: A sam­ple Let­ter of Roman­tic Intent

EDW Lynch

DICTATED BUT NOT READ

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