EDW Lynch, Cor­po­rate Manglomerate

As part of the EDW Lynch cor­po­rate manglomerate’s ongo­ing efforts to main­tain an open dia­logue with our stake­hold­ers, we are proud to intro­duce Ask EDW, a reg­u­lar fea­ture that will allow the pub­lic to ask ques­tions directly to Chair­man and CEO EDW Lynch.* To ask a ques­tion, email edwlynch@edwlynch.com

*or his autho­rized sig­na­to­ries and assigns

THE QUESTION: Can I date EDW Lynch?
–M., San Francisco

THE ANSWER:
First of all, I’d like to say a friendly cor­po­rate hello to our stake­hold­ers and the gen­eral pub­lic.  Please don’t be alarmed by my use of the “first per­son.” In addi­tion to being a cor­po­rate entity, I am also a man. I have feel­ings and opin­ions, just like you, except mine are wholly owned intel­lec­tual prop­erty of my cor­po­rate man­glom­er­ate. Con­fused? Don’t be. I am EDW Lynch, cor­po­rate man­glom­er­ate. EDW Lynch CM is me.

M., the short answer to your ques­tion is no, you can­not date me. The cor­po­rate man­glom­er­ate has been off the San Fran­cisco roman­tic mar­ket since June 15th, 2010 (see our press con­fer­ence announc­ing the depar­ture.)

What does that mean? Well it cer­tainly does NOT mean that EDW Lynch is cur­rently in a rela­tion­ship (in our par­lance, a cor­po­rate part­ner­ship.) It means that we took a long hard look at mar­ket con­di­tions in San Fran­cisco, and on the advice of Jas­mine Steel and our Part­ner Man­age­ment team, decided to take the man­glom­er­ate, tem­porar­ily, off the roman­tic mar­ket. We did this for a vari­ety of rea­sons, but mainly: the San Fran­cisco roman­tic mar­ket is cur­rently in reces­sion and can­not sup­port the pre­mium posi­tion that EDW Lynch inhab­its. Just look for the key indi­ca­tors of a healthy roman­tic mar­ket: sin­gle women, returned text mes­sages, leg­warm­ers and armwarm­ers. You wont find them right now.

We’re look­ing for­ward to the end of this reces­sion just as much as any­one. When mar­ket con­di­tions improve, EDW Lynch will once again be listed as eli­gi­ble. In the mean­while, feel free to con­tact our Part­ner Man­age­ment Divi­sion (partnermanagement@edwlynch.com) to dis­cuss future part­ner­ing oppor­tu­ni­ties with EDW Lynch.

Mean­while, sorry ladies.

Best,

EDW Lynch

Tags: Partner Management, romantic recession

This entry was posted on Thursday, July 29th, 2010 at 12:15 pm and is filed under Ask EDW. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.